Building Inner Strength: How Positive Affirmations Help My Kids (and Me) Navigate Anxiety

Building Inner Strength

Hey Mama,

Let me tell you—anxiety is no stranger in my house. It’s like an uninvited guest that shows up at the worst times and makes itself way too comfortable. I was first diagnosed with anxiety as a teen, so I know all too well the tight chest, racing thoughts, and overwhelming urge to run and hide. Now, as a mom, when my kids express their own battles with anxiety, it’s like my entire being wants to retreat. But here’s the thing: I have to make the choice to push through—for them and for me.

Each of my kids experiences anxiety in their own way. My 8-year-old recently cried while getting ready for school, saying, “The negative thoughts in my head are so loud, and it’s making me sad and anxious.” My 11-year-old son is a chronic nail and knuckle biter, channeling his nervous energy into his hands. And my teen daughter? She’s been navigating anxiety for years, starting when she was just a little girl and began pulling out her eyelashes when she was stressed.

This behavior is actually a condition called trichotillomania, a type of compulsive hair-pulling often triggered by stress or anxiety. It’s an incredibly challenging condition for both the child experiencing it and the parent watching them struggle. If you’re curious or want to learn more, you can check out this helpful resource on trichotillomania.

Raising an HSP: A Mighty Challenge and a Beautiful Gift

In addition to her anxiety, my teen is also a highly sensitive person (HSP). If you’ve never heard of HSPs, they’re individuals who experience the world with heightened sensitivity. They’re deeply empathetic, intuitive, and creative, but they also feel emotions with an intensity that can be overwhelming.

When she was 8, we turned to therapy, specifically cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), to help her manage her big feelings and her trichotillomania. It was life-changing for her—and for me. If you think your child might be an HSP, I highly recommend exploring the topic further. You can take this HSP quiz for children to see if your child might benefit from extra support. You might also discover that you also fall into this category as well (hi, um, that’s totally me…wow) and although this discovery may seem like a lot, it will also answer a lot. Plus, now you can seek support right alongside your child. You’ll understand yourself and your child so much better.

Oh, and I am happy to report all her eyelashes have grown back and are long and stunning! Now, we are working on eyebrow twisting… but the pulling has stopped so we take that as a huge win. 

Positive Affirmations: A Tool for Anxiety

One thing that’s helped all my kids (and, let’s be honest, me too) is incorporating positive affirmations into our daily lives. When kids repeat empowering phrases, they start to replace negative self-talk with words of encouragement and strength.

Affirmations work by creating new pathways in the brain, teaching kids to reframe those “loud negative thoughts” into something quieter, calmer, and more manageable.

How We Use Affirmations in Our House

We keep it simple but effective:

  • Sticky Notes on Mirrors: Each of my kids has their own set of affirmations written on sticky notes and stuck to their bathroom mirrors. Every morning, they see phrases like, “I can do hard things,” and “It’s okay to feel nervous—I am brave anyway.”
  • Bedtime Reflections: At the end of the day, we talk about one thing we’re proud of and repeat an affirmation that feels meaningful. For my daughter, it might be, “I am strong, even when I feel overwhelmed.”

Favorite Affirmations for Kids
Here are a few that resonate with my family:

  • “I can do hard things.”
  • “I am brave, even when I feel nervous.”
  • “Mistakes help me learn and grow.”
  • “I am worthy of love and kindness.”
  • “I can find calm within myself.”
  • “I choose to focus on the good.”

A Personal and Ongoing Journey

Mama, I won’t sugarcoat it—helping kids navigate anxiety isn’t easy. Sometimes, their struggles mirror my own so closely that I feel like I’m right back in the thick of it as a teenager. My first instinct is often to retreat, but I’ve learned that pushing through and embracing them in their battles is what they need most.

Through therapy, affirmations, and ongoing support, we’ve found tools that make the tough days more manageable. And while anxiety is a constant visitor in our home, we’re learning to meet it with resilience, compassion, and sometimes even humor.

If you’re raising a child with anxiety—or suspect they might be an HSP—know that you’re not alone. There’s help, there’s hope, and there’s a way forward. Positive affirmations are just one piece of the puzzle, but they’re a powerful one.

Big hugs and deep breaths,
Carly

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